Happy Fat Thursday!

Today is one of my favorite "holidays" on the Polish calendar. On the Thursday before Fat Tuesday, all across the country, Poles are eating traditional filled pastries, called pączki (plural for pączek). They are quite similar to the bismarcks from Sunrise Bakery I enjoyed eating as a youngster.

Apparently, these treats are meant to use up all the lard, sugar, and fruit in the house before the start of Lent, when they are forbidden. Get down to your bakery and celebrate Fat Thursday, Polish style. I am on my fifth pączki today. Check out this video from a Chicago newsstation, where one bakery makes 100,000 of them for this big day.

Better late than never . . .

The month of January is not over yet. Today is only the 28th. But it is a special day since it's my mom's birthday. This afternoon, I called her up during my last class of the day. It was around 7:30 AM back in Minnesota and even though she is now retired, she was up and out of bed ready to face the day. So, my class and I serenaded her with the traditional English language version of Happy Birthday, and then went right into a rousing rendition of the Polish version, "Sto Lat". I think it made her day. It definitely made the day of a lot of 6th graders to hear my mom on the phone. Could it be hard for them to believe that I actually have a family back in the U.S.? Well, just in time, before it becomes a bit dated, I give you my Christmas holiday highlights video:

Sensitive male . . .

Yet another cruel reminder that I'm still very much a foreigner occurred to me as I was attending my weekly Polish group meeting. Today, we were listening to a dialog on CD between a couple who were on a date at a restaurant. There is more of a backstory behind this meeting, but only those who have any familiarity with the book "Polish in 4 Weeks" will have an appreciation for such ramblings. And yes dear readers, I can hear you snickering out there at the absurdity of the book's title. Anybody who has tried to learn Polish, knows that you need to be either unemployed with no other source of entertainment or preparing for your Mormon mission to come anywhere close to learning Polish in 4 months, let alone weeks.

As the Polish are fond of saying, "Whatever!". Anyway, during the dialogue, the couple are ordering dinner and, in true chivalrous fashion, the man orders for the woman. I never understood this. Wouldn't it be more polite for the man to let the woman speak for herself?

It's ironic that I've had to reverse this practice, and get in touch with my feminine side when dining out with my girlfriend, Luiza. Anybody who has come over from the states for a visit knows that my Polish is limited to taxicabs and restaurants. There is some small shred of pride in actually knowing the words for "black coffee", "red wine", and "You're going the wrong f'ing way!" To the friend or relative straight off the plane, I come off sounding like a native Polack (a politically correct term over here, by the way).

But this butchering of the language has grown tiresome for "moja dziewczyna" (my girl) and she has now taken to ordering for me at restaurants. I am trying to regain my dignity by at least ordering my own beverage, but I think she's making the point that I don't make enough of an effort to study my Polish. Point taken.

Speaking of beverages, we went down to Krakow last weekend and I ran into my dream beer on the street. I tried to get it to stand still by giving it a couple zlotys and posing for a picture, but that brewski must have sensed my thirst and took off running before I could take a sip. Oh well, I will have to make due with his little brothers until we meet again.

No need for self-improvement . . . and bon voyage!

By the looks of things, few of you out there reading the Chronicle have any real desire to improve in 2008. I'm sure that some out there didn't feel the need to take the survey because it would remind them of failed resolutions past, but I would hope that I have more than 6 readers. If not, then you 6 people really have a lot of time on your hands for multiple visits.

The last couple days have been quite inspiring since some of my colleagues have returned from the international teacher job fair in Bangkok. After your first overseas gig, you are fortunate enough to possess the experience that the "next level" of schools is looking for. These are the dream jobs where you can send some serious amounts of currency home for a rainy day, and get to lie on the beach or hike around lush tropical jungles in your spare time. Not only that, but instead of going to the frozen tundra in Waterloo, you can take a trip to sunny Thailand where you get to decide your next few years over the course of a couple days, and in some cases, a few hours. Job fairs are a roller coaster of emotion.

It really piques the curiosity to hear how in-demand teachers are outside of the U.S. One of my colleagues was courted by 9 different schools before settling on his next posting in Tokyo. The benefits package he showed me was quite sweet, not to mention the added bonus of being paid in yen, as the dollar has taken a Titanic drop in the last year. Plus, the administrative team celebrated like they had just won the lottery when he decided to sign with their school. Heady stuff and quite an ego trip.

Others leaving AS-dub will be working in India, Thailand, Indonesia, and Syria next year. Yes, Syria. After you wade through all of the CNN propaganda, you will find that Damascus has an amazing upside to it. The school there has actually been in existence for over 50 years. That's another unique thing about job fairs . . . you can talk yourself into working in a country that wasn't even remotely on your radar screen if the school and surroundings sound right. Next thing you know, you're riding a camel across the desert.

While I still have at least a couple more years left here in Warsaw, which really has been a "dream job" in its own right, thinking about the astonishing number and scope of possibilities out there certainly helps me get through these January blahs. That, and the weather has been unseasonably warm and sunny the last few days . . . maybe we are having an early spring.

Reader commentary and obscure uses for international students

I would first like to thank the three motivated folks who contributed to my last blog entry with some informed political commentary. One of them even smarmily corrected me on my inquiry about the President of England. The queen of standardized testing, Patricia from Boise, misread the second part of my question. I KNOW that England does not have a prime minister. I should have used the word "leader" in my question, but we here at the Chronicle always appreciate feedback from our readers.

Mike, writing in from Iowa, gave some firsthand insight into the cornfield caucus. I'm sorry that Obama was not able to carry this momentum into New Hampshire and secure a victory. I've talked to a colleague who was home in Iowa over vacation. It was interesting to hear her describe the opportunity to meet politicians on a more intimate basis. I'm not talking Bill Clinton "intimate" here. But she did listen to him speak to an audience of only 200 people. Amazing that some have to pay $1000 for a chicken dinner and some witty commentary from our ex-Prez, and potential First Lady.

Nate, also in Boise, knew that President Sarkozy in France is newly engaged to Italian former supermodel, Carla Bruni. So who's settling in this relationship? Hmmmm. Newly elected French President, age 53 vs. Aspiring singer, heiress to a tire-manufacturing fortune, and former supermodel, age 40. They must have met on match.com. Keep those comments coming readers!

Today I debunked my long-held belief that the Swedish chef on the Muppet Show is only speaking gibberish. On a whim, I decided to show a YouTube clip of the chef to my Swedish speaking students, hoping to find out if Jim Henson did his research when writing lines for one of my favorite muppets. They did confirm that there are actual Swedish words sprinkled in with the unintelligible dialogue. You learn something new every day. Check out this clip of the chef preparing turtle soup. Pure comic genius.

Obamamania?

The first Presidential primary is happening in New Hampshire today. I can't think of anything else I know about this state other than their official motto: "Live Free or Die". Just like the obscure state of Iowa had their moment in the sun last week with their caucus, the Granite State is taking its turn to make decisions that will influence the scope of the upcoming "George W. Bush, will you please go now!" election. Yes, like the Dr. Seuss character Marvin K. Mooney, I just wish our chimp in office would just go away. Forever.

On a more positive note, Poland has caught a whiff of Obama fever. The results of the Iowa caucus were splashed across the front page of the daily rag here in Warsaw. It's amazing how much the rest of the world pays attention to American politics. Equally stunning is how little America pays attention to the governmental affairs of the rest of the globe. Can any readers out there name the recently elected President of France? or England for that matter? Please respond in the comments section. And no cheating by using Google.

So does anybody else out there think that Obama has a chance? My gut feeling says "Yes" only because people are fed up and want to get behind somebody who is a dramatic contrast of the previous 43 rich, old, white guys in Washington. Some of my colleagues are still hopeful that we will still see our first woman President but I'm thinking that Joe Sixpack sitting on his porch in Tuscaloosa isn't ready to let that happen. But then again, Joe probably isn't ready for a man with Obama's complexion either. That doesn't leave us with many other options. A Baptist minister on the Republican side? I think we've all had enough of the holy roller regime we currently suffer under.

Thanks for letting me editorialize about politics today. After the gluttony of the holidays, things are a bit slow for news at the Chronicle. Make sure you take the poll about your New Year's resolutions. Personally, I am choosing "All of the above" for 2008.

Szczesliwego Nowego Roku! (Happy New Year!)

jet lag (jět'lāg')
n. A temporary disruption of bodily rhythms caused by high-speed travel across several time zones typically in a jet aircraft.

Happy New Year from back in Warsaw. Suffering the effects of jet lag right now certainly makes for a lack of literary ambition, so I will make this entry into the Chronicle a short one. The trans-Atlantic flight was quite pleasant this time. I sat next to a lovely Polish woman who looked to be about 90 years old. I tried a bit of my rudimentary Polish and this resulted in her sharing her food with me. She must have been quite amused. Little old ladies aren't particularly fond of Kit Kats so I totally scored her dessert. It's the little things in life . . .

Well, I must finish off the day. I only teach two classes but this has been one of the longest days. The combination of travel fatigue and lack of motivation on the kids part certainly has been tough.